My daughter is home sick today. Well, she has a "temperature" of 99.8 anyway. Here's how the day has gone so far:
We've been out of toilet paper since yesterday so I borrowed her tissues to put on my toilet. Apparently she was not pleased with this, even though there are tissues everywhere else in the house and she has not been in her room since she woke up, so she took them back and put them on her desk and then left her room. I discovered they were gone from the bathroom after having a nice leisurely morning poop so I had to walk all the way to her bedroom to get something to wipe. TMI???
THEN, I let the dog out and back in so there would be no accidents and told her I was going to take a quick shower. I had told her earlier that she should not let the animals in and out since she was sick and the cold air would not do her any good; especially in her flimsy nightgown. About five minutes into my shower she came into the bathroom and said her cat really needed to come in!!!! This is a cat that usually spends the entire day outside while she's at school. I asked her where she left the dog and she said she let him outside. Apparently she could disregard what I said to let the dog out, but couldn't to let the cat in. On top of that, it had to all be resolved during the middle of my ten minute shower. That's when I kinda lost it....
She is currently on the bed reading a book behind me and letting out the most obnoxious, gross-sounding farts I have ever heard come from a nine year old's butt. She's also rubbing her feet together back and forth and the sound is causing my right eye to twitch. I'm trying my best not to react as I type this.
It's not even 11am so I will be repeating the following mantra for the rest of the day - "I love my daughter. I love me daughter. I love my daughter......."